“I’ve been a carer for 20 years since my son had a stroke aged 26. This took away a large part of his vision. The emotional turmoil was as great as the loss of sight – and he refused to change how he lived his life. The results were many injuries with quite serious consequences.  

“My son is also a heavy drinker and a drug user. He went on to have two further strokes and continued to drink and take substances. This created chaos – and the chaos has continued, with injuries becoming more regular. He has also developed more health problems, including type one diabetes, and now has neuropathy in his hands and feet.

“I help my son wash, encourage him to take his insulin and get his tablets for him. If I didn’t, he wouldn’t take them, or forget to take them, or take too many. I cook for him, wash his clothing, manage all his phone calls, paperwork and appointments. I have had to give up my job, which has had a serious impact on our finances. I’m now 63 and I can’t do it all anymore. 

“He is difficult to manage. He has just disappeared today – he will be taking drugs somewhere, which causes great anxiety for me. 

“There are very few happy times with drugs and alcohol. On occasion, though, we do get into fits of giggles: his sense of humour is wicked. 

“I’ve become more reliant upon services such as the local carers centre for help filling in forms for support.  

“We also have a wonderful woman who does massage and reiki. Alcoholics Anonymous is a support for me too and I’ve been a member for 20 years. 

“When times become fraught, I just put on my coat and go for a walk. I have learnt to detach and walk alongside my son, allowing events to unfold rather than trying to control them. I try to plan a day out somewhere nice every month and always aim to connect with someone every day by text to try and stay well. 

“I have forgotten to say the reason I do what I do. I do this out of love and duty, and because there is no one else.”